Letting Go....

When Bronwyn was about one year old, I would dream of the day that she would start going to school.  I would tell myself that I could survive the next few years with the knowledge that she would be in school in a handful of years.  But during that handful of years I have learned to deal with the ups and downs of motherhood, and now that she is in school, I'm having a hard time with it!

Don't get me wrong, I love having her out of the house in the afternoon.  Bronwyn hasn't napped in years, so afternoons have been a struggle since the rest of us want to nap.  But sending a child to school is so much more than just a 3 hour break in the afternoon.  It's letting go.  It's trusting that you have given your child the tools they will need to behave, make friends, learn, and not get lost.  It is nervewracking for a control freak like me.  I suddenly feel so left out of her life.  And while I know she is ready to start having parts of her life that don't include me, I'm not ready for it!

But I didn't have a choice, so I sent her off to her first day of kindergarten!  She was beaming!

This tradition was in the paper and I loved it!  Each year I plan to take her picture with a sign saying what she wants to be when she grows up.  Bronwyn has alot of interests, and claims she is going to do "all the jobs".  Which is pretty much true if she decides to be a mom.  :)

She got a little nervous once she was inside the classroom.  But when I picked her up at the end of the day she was all smiles.  I actually love picking her up from school because she always looks so happy to see me.  It makes my day!

After I reluctantly forced myself out of the classroom, I headed over to the "Boo hoo Breakfast", put on by the PTA.  But when I got there it was more of a celebratory gathering for the other moms.  So I quickly had to compose myself.  But it wasn't just my fault!  Bronwyn's teacher gave us all a poem entitled "Poem for the First Day of School". It reads:

I wonder what you're doing right now,
and if everyone is treating you kind.

I hope that there is a special person, 
a nice friend that you can find.

I wonder if the teacher knows 
just how special you are to me,

and if the brightness of your heart
is something she can see.  

I wonder if you are thinking about me 
and if you need a hug.

I already miss the sound of your voice 
and how you give my leg a tug.

I wonder if you could possibly understand 
how hard it is for me to let you grow.

On this day know that my heart breaks, 
for this is the first step in letting my baby go.

How could I not cry? 

My mom always had chocolate chip cookies waiting for us after the first day of school, so I couldn't resist whipping some up while Bronwyn was in class.

Magsy can't wait to go back to preschool next week!  Here she is with an awesome castle she designed.  :)

Now my days are filled with dreams of this little guy starting school.  He sure keeps me on my toes!  As crazy as he makes me, I already know he will be leaving me way too soon!